the end

Summer is quickly speeding away. Only 15 days left until the start of school. I feel anxiety tighten in my throat and each breathe harder to take than the last as I type that! Last year was so difficult for us, and this summer was such a welcome retreat, break, blessing! I never wanted it to end.

As the days, weeks, then months passed on the calender, I tried to ignore the feeling of sudden doom. {I tend to be a little over dramatic... can you tell? } If I spent my time worrying about when it would end, I would never enjoy any of it.

So that just what I did. I turned a blind eye to the end of June. I cautiously noted the middle of July being awfully close to August {without freaking out}. Now, all the sudden, yes the anxiety & stress has all surfaced. The city schools site had a ticking countdown on their website. I was looking for some info and as I saw it the blood drained from my face. no.. so soon.... where did the summer go? Back to the hustle & bustle of school, packed lunches, germs, OMG the germs & sickness, lost jackets, shoes, books. Most of all, being separated from my children. That's the part that really gets me. I feel like part of my soul is cut away when they are gone. It's not a welcoming feeling!

We will be salvaging every last minute to enjoy each others company and the beautiful end of summer days we have left. I'll even "try" to stay calm.