Smile

Hip Hip Hooray, it's Wednesday! I'm looking forward to a relaxing end of the week here. It seems this time every year the hustle & bustle starts to get to me. I want to be out in the sunshine, playing with my kids, with no daily to-do list. Ummm... well, that never "actually" happens. I do have four kids and a husband after all. I would need a nanny, cook and housekeeper, gardener to make that a reality, and then I'd be far too bored. 

I do look forward to the simpler days ahead. The calmness and free rhythm that Summer brings. Having done both traditional public school and homeschool with the kids, I'm really starting to miss the homeschooling. I love, love, love their current school. Mostly I miss all the time together that homeschooling afforded us. Both methods have their good and bad qualities. No, there isn't a move back towards homeschool happening here, again. I'm looking forward to the freedom of summer. Long afternoons lying in the grass watching the clouds with the children, parks full of happy toddlers and their new puppies, tending the garden and watching the flowers grow and blossom. Sleeping in... please, just a couple times kids? 

I'm feeling a little ho-hum and lackadaisical theses days. Just drifting through, not much inspiration to sew, or create or clean. Just looking ahead with a countdown flashing brightly in my eyes. Only a few more weeks. I feel like I am the one in school again, watching the clock tick away slower & slower at the last hour of the day.  Freedom awaits us. Smile brightly. 

Successful Day

We had presents, a half eaten before frosted cake, and lots of handmade goodies. Add a few endless smiles, and it was a successful, happy day!

Making

Life is what you make it. So why not make it beautiful, lovely, make it grand. Make it happy. Just make it, for you! I spent years angry at the world. Just kinda fluttering by where the wind blew me. I was miserable... and lonely. One day, I woke up and decided "I" was going to lead my life. I was going to stop being angry, blaming people, and feeling sad. I was in charge of my destiny. I would create the life I wanted. I can say with perfect honesty, I've never looked back! My life is so full of love & happiness now. That said, I still have bad days {sometimes years}, I waver a bit and think I have no control. The truth is there are things in life that no one has control over. Sometimes, things just happen-good or bad, it is, as it is.

Life is what you make it. A dandelion "weed", becomes a treasure for mama, in a child's eye's. A piece of paper, an endless opportunity at creativity. Or, you could look at it as a weed, or a simple sheet of white paper, nothing more, nothing less. Some tough moments in our life have taught me compassion, and gratitude. With the thanksgiving holiday, just passed, I've reassessed all the wonderful things I have to be thankful for. I am living the life I always wanted, a houseful of children, with lots & lots of love to go around. A career, making. I am a maker-whether I am sewing, painting or knitting, or growing babies, I am always making. Life works in spells, right now I am making less, and spending more time with family. Some days I wish I had just a little more time. One day when I have hours a day to just sit and make, I'll most likely be missing the rhythm of our days now. With all it's noise, messy meals, and tiny hands to kiss & hold. I am so very thankful right now.

 Life is what you make of it. Just go where the day takes you. 

New pic's

 We spent a little time Sunday, re-shooting a few Kunklebbay items and photographing lots of new stuff for the first time. I'm really happy with how they came out and we had a lot of fun.... Well, I thought it was a lot of fun. My husband thought it to be a bit chaotic and said "let's just go", several times. The thing is with 4 kids, a park, boxes of merchandise and shoot props, it's bound to be chaotic, it's finding the little bits in between that can be used. I am so happy with those little bits.

The chaotic bits: a three year old who was determined he was at the park only to climb tree's, and only those on the other side of the field, a large dog who wanted to join the kids pictures, a cranky baby who wanted to know what in the world we were doing in the park.. with his rocking chair & pillow. A grumpy seven year old [who think's he's 15] who just wanted to either be in every picture, or alone, in the woods.

All in all I took 432 pictures. We got to run in the park for an hour. We missed the rain [as soon as I started our van, sprinkles started dancing across the windshield. {sigh, really?} Undeterred, I drove to the park anyways with hope. Finally, I was happy to realize there would be no more rain.

Best of all, I got this picture below. Which makes me smile with happiness! If you'd like to see more of the photo shoot and some new items, check out the shop: Kunklebaby

Words to live by:

Laugh often & laugh loud 

Whenever possible, make peace

Challenge EVERYTHING, you think you know

Sometimes you just got to get a little dirty

Always have fresh flowers in your house- it's like a little burst of sunshine

Never, ever forget the little guy

A little Summer left

While the older two are off at school, and Baby Julian napping, Lucian and myself are soaking up every last bit of "summer" left. The days are still filled with sunny skies, but the mornings now have a touch of brisk, Autumn air. Tree's are still green, but just a few brown leaves have been making their way to our porch & yard. The squirrels have started hiding acorns in all my potted plants. Fall will be here before we know it.

Yesterday, Lucian found three of these little caterpillars. He decided they were a family and went to work reuniting them. A happy Mama, Daddy and baby were relocated together, under a large tree. "Now don't run away and go lost again", he gently tells them.

the end

Summer is quickly speeding away. Only 15 days left until the start of school. I feel anxiety tighten in my throat and each breathe harder to take than the last as I type that! Last year was so difficult for us, and this summer was such a welcome retreat, break, blessing! I never wanted it to end.

As the days, weeks, then months passed on the calender, I tried to ignore the feeling of sudden doom. {I tend to be a little over dramatic... can you tell? } If I spent my time worrying about when it would end, I would never enjoy any of it.

So that just what I did. I turned a blind eye to the end of June. I cautiously noted the middle of July being awfully close to August {without freaking out}. Now, all the sudden, yes the anxiety & stress has all surfaced. The city schools site had a ticking countdown on their website. I was looking for some info and as I saw it the blood drained from my face. no.. so soon.... where did the summer go? Back to the hustle & bustle of school, packed lunches, germs, OMG the germs & sickness, lost jackets, shoes, books. Most of all, being separated from my children. That's the part that really gets me. I feel like part of my soul is cut away when they are gone. It's not a welcoming feeling!

We will be salvaging every last minute to enjoy each others company and the beautiful end of summer days we have left. I'll even "try" to stay calm.

This Moment

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. Join in at Soulemama.

Out-takes

Some fun outtakes from our Kunklebaby photoshoot today. I've had a huge PILE of stuff sitting here for 2 months waiting to be photographed so I could add it to my shop. We had a few spare minutes today so I decided to try and get some shots... and add Baby {J} to the Kunklebaby model mix. {haha}. He's 8 months old today! Can you believe it? He's so cute I can't even stand it!

Seriously? How many pics are you going to take Mama??

Biggest Brother feeling left out.

Almost done when who should show up? Batman! Little {L} was all dressed in his Batman gear, even sporting the Batman scowl. {did you all know Batman never smiles? I do now}

You can check out what made the "cut" in the shop. I'll be adding some new bibs through the weekend. Lots of girlie one's too. Take a peek at the CUTE shots!

A little more Christmas

I am enjoying every little bit before it's all over for the year. Getting close now!!

Ho HO HO

So, it turns out that Little L is horrified of Santa this year! We went to our local, annual tree lighting. [We have been going for six years now, it's amazing. Tree's, music, lights & fireworks!]. The whole day, {L} was chattering on about Ho-Ho [Santa]. He was chuckling, giggling and running around with excitement. Fast Forward to that night-we arrived late, almost missing the lighting. Mama is stressed [doesn't anyone understand how important this was! lol] Turns out due to "our" [read-husband] lateness we scored a PRIME spot right at the base of the stage. Things are looking up and stressed mama switches to excited again Mama! Thinks, this is going to be amazing! Super close so all the kids can actually see this year. The parade is ending, the crowd is cheering, here comes Santa, he's making his way towards us! I know any moment {L} will be squealing in delight! He's in sight!...and {L} is.... SCREAMING? Screaming and clawing at his Dad like we are trying to feed him to Santa. One morsel at a time! Screaming like his skin is n fire!

I was so confused.... Turns out, the ol' Shrek Christmas movie he's been watching has a scene where Santa, roaring like a jolly Godzilla, eats The Gingerbread Man's girlfriend-all up. This 2 minute scene, have terrified my baby. Looks like this picture is as close to Santa as he will be getting this year! Oh Shrek.

September

Welcome September! I'm so excited for cooler nights & mornings, the promise of fall with all it's wonderful colors and weather [ohh how I love you fall!]. Lots of laughter from the children. Hoping we find a rhythm for our new [somewhat chaotic] school schedules. Another month getting to know the new baby. Health & Happiness.

What are you looking forward to this months?

Random

Living

Eating

Creating

Reflections

Sunday. It's 11am, I'm still in bed snuggling my little nursling. Warm cheek against my breast. Outside the door, a steady sound of controlled chaos creeps in, as the three older children play with their father. I don't want to wake up. I don't want this end. I don't want Monday to ever come. I've been up since 7am, these thoughts repeating in my head, as an endless cycle. One more hour. One more day. I miss my little girl [my only daughter] too much while she's off at school. Her little giggles do not echo through the house. Instead all I hear are the war cries of the boys. Boys and girls really are so very different! Monday means another day dropping her off. My heart cries, NO...stay, but instead I smile. It never reaches my eyes.

I lay here in bed holding my baby close. Baby number four. So many things I know now that I didn't with number one. so very many. Never grow old baby boy! Never age. Stay here in my arms like some mythological god, or peter pan-my babe. You smile and I know it's only time. Time whispers into my ears...school, college, independence, your own family someday. It's only a matter of time until I am no longer nuzzling your chubby feet. Instead I will be chasing your strong legs, as you learn to run. Running from me as I chase after you. Toddlerhood and on, and on. It's only a matter of time. A sadness washes over me as I realize this is the way it's supposed to be. I am lucky to know you, hold you, have you as mine, even if just for a little while.

I breathe a sigh, this idea doesn't bring me the comfort I seek. A sigh. A sigh for the things I cannot change. A sigh for my children, and mostly for me. Accept that Monday will come no matter how long I sit here in my make-shift nest. The one thing you cannot ignore is time. It comes whether celebrated or ignored. With one last kiss and a smile. We arise to see the rest of the family.

My heart still crying for tomorrow...

New Beginnings

These little feet have traveled far, over the past few years, but they have never traveled this far from Mama before.

With the start of school, I'm sending my only daughter off each day. She was so excited to be there-and not a tear, nor tinge of anxiety ever crossed her eyes. She disappeared into a sea of children without even a glance back to see the tears in her mothers eyes.

It's exciting & sad whirlwind all mixed up into one big emotion, I've never felt before. That's the thing about being a mother. As soon as you think you have something figured out or got it all together-you don't. I have been so used to having all my children at home with me-their entire lives. all four. Some of you may run screaming at the very idea, but I LOVED it! It's a new beginning with the family branching out into different directions, together, but physically apart at times.

The other day the kids and I were baking. While looking in the oven on our almost baked, cookies, Mr. {D} said: "Time sure does go fast sometimes, Mom". It sure does son, so much faster than you even know!


My little caterpillar is growing into a butterfly. Just don't fly too far, too quick, baby girl.

A little sewing

I managed to work in a little sewing recently! Two new dresses for Big Sister {M}. She couldn't be more pleased. The girl would be happy to have 100 dresses and change hourly if she could. [which I happen to find adorable].

This one was an easy & quick sew. Just a square of fabric, some elastic thread and a few feet of handmade bias tape. I love that this will fit her for probably 2 years as a dress and then maybe another as a shirt when the length gets too short. With a large family, clothes that the kids don't grow out of after a season are a huge help! They get plenty of use & love that way-just the way handmade items should be.

How to: Mini-Dolls

Need something quick and easy to make for your children? Thes mini-dolls are super fun to play with and can be sewn up in an afternoon.

Pick out fabric that you'd like to use. I chose this cute Japanese import with little girls. Fabric with animals or other people work well also. Many of the Japanses imports have a small scale to the design.

Cut out the pieces you'd like to use. Don't worry about them being perfect. I made these into small circles, but depending on the scale of your "dolls" you can stitch them around the body shape.

Pin them to a felt backing. This will give them a little bit of structure [stiffness] and help them stand up better. [any thick-ish material will work]

Sew around your dolls. Make sure to leave an opening so you can turn them right side out and stuff them.

Turn your doll right side out and stuff. I like to use bamboo stuffing. It have a great shape and feel to it inside children's toys. Any polyester, cotton or bamboo stuffing will work though.

Stitch up the hole. I stitch these by hand, as they are pretty small.

Play!! I made a little tote purse for these girls to live in. Keeps them all in one place, and it's extra fun for your little one. A blanket and a kitty were added for accessories. Get creative!