We had beautiful summer weather here over the weekend. Saturday was spent gardening, giving [D] a much needed haircut, cleaning the yard and dog baths!!
Those smelly dogs sure needed a good cleaning. Bowie, our black dog is a furry, knotted mess by the time spring hits each year. She loves gets scrubbed and fluffy clean. She got a quick brushing, but needs some more!The kids said she looked like a sheep when she was done.
Our other dog is not such a fan or cleanliness...or water. She would be happy to stink for the rest of her life if it meant she didn't have to get wet. She's the dog we have to push out the door to go to the bathroom, when it's raining. She will sulk under the covered porch and refuse until the rain stops.
All the fun we had with the dogs was bitter-sweet. We have come to terms with the fact that our old friend, Bowie is going to have to be put to sleep. Tears well up at the thought every time. She has been my friend through college, good times and some bad, years before and after the kids joined us. She was always there when I needed a snuggle and would give her life to protect me. She has her fair share of annoying quirks, but now in the final days even those seem endearing. I can hardly look at her without wanting to cry lately.
She was my "baby", before I had children. Giving her what may be her last bath, I was reminded of her puppy days when she was[needed] bathed all the time. She would shake and run all through the house trying to dry her fur on anything fabric she could get a hold of. We would watch her and laugh & laugh. She was always happier all clean and sparkly-silly thing. We've made the call to the vet twice now, and just can't seem to commit. I never thought it would end like this-it's heartbreaking!
I never had a pet pass away as a child, so she will be the first. When we welcomed our pets into the family, I had never even thought of "the end". [We have 2 cats and 2 dogs] All the sudden I am realizing how much I have taken them for granted. They are a part of our family and it felt like they always would be. I am suddenly struck by the cruel reality of life. It's been extra hard explaining it to the older children. I don't believe in lying to them and have been talking with them to prepare. When I see the sadness in their eyes, it breaks my heart-twice. I will be missing Bowie and watching my children hurt. [M] thinks her soul with be reborn into a bird. That bird is going to be born at the Columbus Zoo, and she is sure she will know the bird as soon as she lays eyes on it. It is so sweet to me that my four year old can see such beauty in life & death. I'm not there, yet.
1 comment:
Jessica, this post really touched me. I am such a huge animal person (have 3 cats) and lost my dear Ernie 3 years ago. Although not my first pet to have lost, it was the first in my adulthood and was honestly very difficult. I think of him often and sometimes ask him to visit me in my dreams (which he does) – I was very close to him. I can very much understand what you and your family are going through and send you all my love and support. I'll be thinking of you guys and Bowie... (btw, what [M] said is very beautiful. she sounds like an old soul herself!)
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